18 October 2006
4:50 PM
I wish I had my piano with me, right here, right now.
I need to let my fingers run over the keyboard and play out the most beautiful melody ever to calm myself down. To forget everything that's running through my head and whirring around me. To drown myself in the music and shut out all things else. Away from the noises and distractions aching pains that strangle me in their vice-like grip.
I really need a piano. The CD can't do half as good a job.
It was then that I carried you.It's when things seem the worst, that you must not quit.I hate it when people say things they don't mean. Empty promises are the best way to crush me.
Maybe I put too much thought into the most trivial issues. Maybe I'm over-reacting, maybe I'm being over-sensitive, maybe I need to change my perspective and turn around and stand up tall and face the world with a new face of hope and courage. I'm a coward, I admit. Maybe I'm just wallowing in self-pity too much to be able to see anything good about the world.
Thing is, I can be here typing all these and believing in it, but the question is, HOW? How do I get out of this stupid well in which I feel so trapped and locked up?
Let go.Leave the past behind.But memories are not so easily erased.
Press on, press on, focus ahead and run toward your goal. One day, you'll reach it. You gotta wait, you gotta pray and hope and trust and give your all.When will it end?
