God's child
dance
music
basketball
loves people!!! :D

"let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful." hebrews 10:23

live for others. make a difference.

can you believe it, church used to be my happy place.
the precise place which i'm walking away from.
the place i used to, and might still, call my family.
i miss all you guys a whooollllle lot.
and i tell you, this decision is killing me.
but as i've said, i have made, or at least wish to make, up my mind and i don't want to look back already.
currently i am stuck nowhere, in between two places - one known (too known) and one unknown, waiting to be found.
and as much as this all hurts, i know and admit it has been brought upon myself by my own decision. and it's not that i regret the decision, cause weighing all factors i'm still certain that it'll be better to leave. but this does not also mean that you don't miss what you left behind, those feelings are automatically erased, and/or you stop re-considering to reassure yourself.
i think i've mentioned it before, but dinner with you guys that night before youth sunday was so awesome. i really miss you so much. and i really love WOW senior youths :) (not that i don't love juniors! just in a different way! and i have a different kind of fun with them!)
to sum it up in 3 words:
i miss you! <33.

one life i lay at Your altar
one love i have with You
touch me again
fill me as You hold my outstretched hands
one Word You know i will follow
one heart broken to You
use me again
Your mercies follow me
for all my days

service today was so so so awesome, praise God :)

advertisement: GO FOR FESTIVAL OF PRAISE 2007! 3-5august, indoor stadium. (just 2 weeks away!!) don moen and delirious are coming this year. and the speaker's rev phil pringle, apparently he's really good. :)

today is, as sarah would call it, a happy day. as you can see by the many smileys :DD

and prayer was, WHOA. it's true, it's pointless praying if you're as worried after praying as you were before. that isn't true commitment to God and having faith in Him to carry you through. means you haven't really found comfort in Him.
I REALLY HOPE THIS WORKS OUT AND I'M PUTTING ALL MY TRUST IN HIM AND BELIEVING THAT I WON'T BE LET DOWN BECAUSE HE KNOWS BEST AND HIS PLANS ARE PERFECT AND I'M TIRED OF RUNNING ON MY OWN SO I WANT TO LAY IT ALL DOWN, AT HIS FEET AND LET HIM LEAD ME! I'M REALLY REALLY COUNTING ON THIS TO WORK OUT!

heh, sorry. not very reader-friendly, eh? (maybe that was the point.)

I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO STRENGTHENS ME! phil 4:13
(that's the encouragement for the day! :) )

i guess for the most part, i just feel lonely.
the same way you look up into the sky and feel so small, and so insignificant.

and i'm always asking why.

1 thing i've found out recently: I AM BECOMING VERY WHINY. really, whiny until cannot stand it! i hate whiners have i ever mentioned that? and so me becoming whiny is a total disaster and i have to get out of it NOW.


song: what can i do - paul baloche

That's when I knew that I could never have you
I knew that before you did
Still Im the one who's stupid
And theres this burning, like there's always been
I've never been so alone
and I've never been so alive.

(motorcycle drive by - third eye blind)

I DON'T KNOW!

yummmm chocolate.
ok byebye.

nothing's gonna stop me now

I’ll paint it on the walls
‘Cause I’m the one at fault
I’ll never fight again
And this is how it ends

I don’t know what’s worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
To show you what I mean
I don’t know how I got this way
I’ll never be alright
So I’m
Breaking the habit
Breaking the habit
Tonight

i was never into screamy angry songs. (linkin park's an exception.) i might soon die of over-blasting of ipod in my ears.

-------------------------

so, to that topic. yep. i'm going, i've made up my mind and i'm not going to let anything stop me or make me hesitate. i've been through the pondering, re-considering, re-evaluating process way too many times and it's probably the main reason i haven't moved on and so now, i am not going to care about anything that's holding me back and walk out, walk on. it's like calculating net force, sorta. push - pull = +ve, therefore i should go.
:)
if you leave, don't look back (if you leave, nada surf)
how apt.

the enrique iglesias pingpong song is quite cute, haha. (whyyy is it even called the ping pong song, i still don't know.)

GUESS WHAT? i still haven't gotten over finals(!!!!) how much time is time??

IMUL!!!

if i go crazy, don't mind me. wait, maybe you should. nevermind. the choice is yours. (freedom!!)

i am into typing 'okay' instead of 'ok' now. i think it sounds nicer, don't you think? cause 'okay' has the 'aye' sound in it while 'ok' 's just like o-keh, which sounds more singaporean, and nasal.
i just realised that there actually is a lot of homework for the weekend. mostly chinese. eeeeee save me. that word is like poison to my soul. I AM GOING TO DIE FOR ORAL ARE YOU GOING TO DIE WITH ME?
watched 300 with sarah and linlin today, at sarah's house. coooooool show. prepare for glory indeed :) they're really really admirable and honourable.
there're no great movies out now and i'm okay with it cause anyway this period is a totally anti-movie anti-go-out anti-have-fun period! ha! i'm not missing out! 8P
nata categorised my sleep time and various effects of the different ranges of time that i sleep at on my mood the next day:
before 12: normal
between 12 and 2: low
after 2: HIGH!
:D
the match at admiralty (against admiralty u14 boys team)was good :) for me, at least.
it has been a long time since i actually blogged about events, eh? you can't tell how i spent my day from my blog. lol. so boring. gerrrh.
have you ever sat at the back of a truck/lorry, or for that matter any vehicle that is roofless, at night and whizzed across the highway? i love that feeling. the wind in your face. and the chilly night air.
i want to walk in the forest at night. and camp there. any forest. i mean they're all trees anyway. i miss obs. you really have to go with the right people (: thank God for those my obs mates!
and i want to walk along the ECP/esplanade area one night. i think i've never mentioned that before right. anyway i think that is as romantic as singapore can get, hahaha. talk about pathetic(ism?).
our combined sch match is in a weeks' time!!! it just hit me today, when mr ang said so. ohman. the excitement and tension and pressure! heh. GO ADMIRALTY :D it's quite funny, we say like go raffles but go admiralty is like saying go choa chu kang or go tampines. ok it just sounds weird, to me.
i want to sleep.

random things i wish to say:
1. sentosa was awesome i wish we never left
2. i want to go cycling
3. i need to go tanning
4. i love planetshakers they're my favouritest band <333
5. i miss one tree hill. watching grey's now but nothing can beat oth! <3!
6. i think mango juice works for me the same way alcohol works for most people. (how healthy + safe (:)