God's child
dance
music
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loves people!!! :D

"let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful." hebrews 10:23

live for others. make a difference.

3 more days.
what i'm feeling is a mix of bubbling excitement, eager anticipation, and a dreadful sense of foreboding. (wait, can you feel a sense of foreboding? ah, whatever.) i've never stepped into an esplanade concert hall before - not something i'm proud of at all - much less perform in one. whenever i think about it i get all happily jittery inside (: i'm thoroughly thankful and glad i get to perform, even though it means ZERO commitment to street for a short period of time :S

it's that kind of feeling when you can't wait for it to come, but you totally can wait for it to be over. you just wish to meet the moment, and when it finally does, you want it to last forever. i really wonder what concert night will be like. and the worst part, post-concert. the hugs, the smiles, the flowers and gifts, the buzzing spirit in the air, and finally, the farewells, the going home, the dawning upon me that
that marks the end of my life as a chorale member.

every time mr toh calls for the tour group to gather to practise and the few of us sit aside, i find myself imagining what it'd be like if i'd chosen to stay in chorale, and if i were going for the trip. poland, whattheheck. i always wanted to go to europe. and i try to imagine what chorale's gonna be like later this year, how my batch will bond and all especially after the trip. what will it be like to step into lt4 as a visitor instead of a member? to watch them sing and not sing along? i hope they continue the chorale table tradition/practice.
and every time they sing o magnum... it gives me that sense of calm, the kind of mood where you just immerse yourself totally in the music and shut out every other part of your life for the moment. it really is beautiful. plus the fact that i can actually imagine them singing in a cathedral, with the towering ceilings and stained glass and surround sound and whatnot (:

i am going to miss chorale immensely. the people (strangely, or perhaps not so, more the j2s than the j1s cause i'm closer to them), the songs, and just, being part of the choir.

it's really amazing how far we've come since the beginning of the year, in terms of, everything. and i believe concert will be awesome. (:

there won't even be much time to feel all sad over this cause once concert's over, the next day's wednesday which means official street prac. which i obviously cannot miss since i've been missing street for the past 2 weeks (though only 2 official pracs in total). well i guess i'll get over it pretty quickly, considering that time i said every minute i spend with streeters makes me one notch surer of my decision (:

many people have said this to me,"you'll always be part of chorale", i can go back and visit anytime, etcetc. yeah. similar to the reason i finally chose 09A03A, i'm very thankful for the 4 months i got to spend with them, which is way better than none at all.

<3

dance night yesterday, wasn't as mind-blowing as i expected. okay honestly, it was pretty disappointing when i thought about it later. not that the performances weren't good, they were. but just not exactly outstanding. not the kind that'd leave your mouth hanging wide open in pure admiration or disbelief, or hold your breath for the entire duration of the performance.. you get what i mean. i'm sorry.

anyway last night i felt one of the strangest of moods. i was at once both very happy and very sad. quite inexplicable. and it was somehow a result of dance night, or everything that happened the entire night/day. so i was lying in bed thinking cause i couldn't fall asleep (or maybe the other way round O.o) but anyway, that was probably why i was so sleepy at the start of prac this morning and couldn't stop yawning. highly irritating. im' really really trying to get as much sleep as possible now till tuesday. seriously my whole life revolves around chorale now, haha. i haven't been doing any work nor dance nor anything but sing and mug scores. exciting eh :D