05 September 2008
10:37 PM
"to get away from these books"this night i contemplatetonight i sit in pensive silence,
listening to each drawing in of breath
and the post-its rustling in the breeze.
this is a feeling of having something
removed from my heart,
an emptiness, a longing.
seems like tese books trace my paths.
newspaper cuttings, notes, pens and pencils,
words, words, words.
me and my irrational cravings;
a mind wandering like a freely-moving particle
in mid-air.
they won't stop reminding you about
A's - portfolios, records, bright-shining CV's and
"leaders of tomorrow".
and those who harp:
children in Africa have no education.
most of them yearn to.
'be thankful.'
'i am thankful.'
'you can never be thankful enough'.
i am thankful, but
is there no end to this?
we hardly question the dreams we chase.
i only wish to lie in a meadow,
watch prety butterflies,
and taste fresh air;
or roam the streets at night,
letting the crisp air dance on my skin,
telling me what freedom is.
it's nature that beckons us to pause,
nature that frees us from the bindings of books,
shows us what it's like to live.
and to hear the stillness of the night
and listen to your own heartbeat,
forgetting the world
is all it takes to remember that the
essence of life will never be found in print;
but only in the intricacies of God's creation.
still, even this i write here is penned;
will we ever escape?
---------------------------
tonight is one tree hill therapy night. i didn't study anything at all today, save population pyramids. oh and i did pw this morning.
"it's really gonna take some time, peyton. you guys went through something really traumatic."
"yea but what if you have finals, and you can't sleep, and you don't have time?"
"well then hope for your old friend to tell you that life just kicks you around sometimes. and it scares you, and it beats you up, but, there's a day when you realise you're not just a survivor. you're a warrior. you're tougher than anything that throws you away. "
- brooke, oth 4
"the people i admire are the people who carve a life for themselves after their dream dies." nathan, oth 4
